**Author Forward** - This blog may read as being a tad pessimistic, like a rather public airing of dirty laundry, or like a reaction to one (or more) people. It isn't. I'm too lazy to dry my laundry any way other than a clothes dryer, and these are simple humorous observations that I have with a few things...Please read them, laugh and enjoy....or not laugh and hate....but tell people you did regardless; the choice is yours. ** 
So what if I told you that running was a lie….?
See, all of that stuff I just said is true (except the
‘baldness’ part), but within our sport are a few generally unspoken lies and
mistruths. They attack the fabric of our sport and taint the enjoyment of our
pursuits like a thick curly hair in a Fetticini Carbonara.
It’s time to attack these lies head on….right now.
1)
The
History:
An unfortunate reality of living in a competitive world, and
more specifically; the dog-eat-dog world of running, is that none of us are
immune from the inevitability of being compared to that which has come, and run
before us.
There has been, and always will be that guy (or girl) who
remembers when so-and-so ran that impossibly fast time with one shoe and a
migraine over a course littered with broken glass and Lego pieces. Rose
coloured glasses sometimes become aids in setting up road-blocks to goals and
achievements, and sometimes, the truth really just gets in the way of an
incredibly good story!
My rule of thumb when someone pipes up an incredible tale is
to listen and enjoy it, but treat it as unproven (until carefully analysed and
confirmed true). It might as well be in a parallel universe, because you are in
the here and now, and you (without good costume and mannerism coaching) are not
them.
2)
There
is a world-wide-web of lies:
The popularity of run sharing sites like Strava, Running
Ahead, Mapmyrun and Garmin-connect have seen the normally pretty dormant
competitive aspects of running ramped up to almost constant proportions. You
see, in the past the only time you really
could accurately measure yourself against someone else was during races when
they were actually running with/against you.
Training and downtime used to be an awesomely great time for
soul-searching and ‘alone’ time to
grow and learn with our own bodies as the
yard stick.
And besides….technology sucks. It does. Anyone who lived
through the cassette, VHS, DVD, and CD eras are well aware that not all
technological ‘revolutions’ are a step forward.
Sometimes, and sometimes frequently technology fails, and with most
consumer devices very often they degenerate over time. At the risk of sounding
like a conspiracy theorist…
Due to the infancy of the technology behind GPS watches and
phones, and the drive to make this technology simpler and cheaper, very often
there are accuracy problems. This is why the tracking of a running-GPS will
occasionally cut a corner, elongate a section of a run, ‘forget’ a kilometre,
or simply decide the middle of your training run included a brief foray into a
nearby body of water.
By running regular loops, running in groups, and generally
not relying so heavily on this equipment, these mistakes will be far less
emotionally crippling.
Sometimes race results and details were incorrectly entered
and sometimes courses were measured incorrectly. Mistakes happen, after all,
Adolf Hitler was awarded the Nobel Peace Prize in 1939 it’s true.
The fact remains that when talking to competitors sometimes
tactics and mental warfare can be the undertone to simple and seemingly
innocuous conversations. Occasionally a competitor will smile sweetly and tell
you that they “haven’t been training”, have “been injured all year” and “are
just taking it easy today”….
Because, the thing is…when your mental game is focussed on
your own performance, on that particular course, in those particular
conditions, with competitors used only as moving yard-sticks to latch onto and
pass….any mind-trickery is a wasted exercise. Your lead-up training cannot be
re-done, so accept the condition you are currently in as being the cards dealt,
and play on!
Suddenly, the advent of GPS watch and phone technology has
meant that on these websites LITERALLY EVERY RUN is available for others to judge
and comment on. Conversely other people’s runs are there for you to analyse and
measure yourself against. These sites list total kilometres against previous
months, elevation, speed and cadence versus previous ‘identical’ runs. They celebrate
every gain and PB, and painfully ignore equal (or worse) performances.
They
assign course records and segments worldwide and remind you every time that
someone eclipses your times on these.
These sites even rank and order every athlete according to
performance and every manner of criteria. You may work your way to the top of
these lists, and then the pressure is there to stay there the next day, and the
day after that.
Soon enough an obsessive runner is measuring themselves
against the best version of themselves, and every other runner on the
planet…..CONSTANTLY.
On a side note, I’m pretty sure the next Terminator movie
will include a tactic similar to this; in that future online run-logs are
corrupted by ‘the machines’ to the point that the surviving nuclear-holocaust
‘humans’ implode when pitted against each-other in a never-ending endurance
marathon. You read it here first, and Hollywood…you’re welcome.
The long and the short of it is, your ego, can be the worst liar
of all….work to keep it in check, by being realistic around recovery and
training, and limiting your access to apps and sites that model themselves as
giant ‘appendage’ measuring competitions.
3)
Technology
sucks:
And besides….technology sucks. It does. Anyone who lived
through the cassette, VHS, DVD, and CD eras are well aware that not all
technological ‘revolutions’ are a step forward.
Sometimes, and sometimes frequently technology fails, and with most
consumer devices very often they degenerate over time. At the risk of sounding
like a conspiracy theorist…
…The companies do this to ensure that eventually you will
replace and/or update the product. Oh! And 747 Airplanes release conformity
chemicals that keep the masses in check.
By running regular loops, running in groups, and generally
not relying so heavily on this equipment, these mistakes will be far less
emotionally crippling.
Also you’ll learn to train and run by the ‘feel’ of your
body; actually I’m not entirely sure if that IS the truth, or that the
government has programmed me to say that?
4)
History
made mistarkes:
The unfortunate thing about History, is that occasionally it
captures mistakes in black and white. Kind of like the dinosaur who hides his
poor attempt at an origami swan into the amber sap of a tree, which has
resulted in modern Palaeontologists assuming they all lacked the dexterity and
ability to do this to create intricate folded-paper sculptures.
So while most records can be relied upon, they’re worth
admiring and using for nostalgia only, not for obsessively using as points of
comparison.
5)
Human
Beings are sometimes monsters:
The fact remains that when talking to competitors sometimes
tactics and mental warfare can be the undertone to simple and seemingly
innocuous conversations. Occasionally a competitor will smile sweetly and tell
you that they “haven’t been training”, have “been injured all year” and “are
just taking it easy today”….
…This is generally either a defeatist comment to make
excuses, or a legitimate account. But sometimes a massive alpha move can be
made by putting the opposition off guard (assuming no competition), then
blasting them onto the back foot by exceeding expectations. It’s dastardly, but
an occasional phenomena. People are horrible sometimes.
In addition to this there will always be those runners who
use every opportunity to weasel in constant reminders about previous
achievements that are remarkable and dwarf those of common man (most
importantly you). Whilst (some of the time) this isn’t specifically lying, it
is a huge jackass move, played by someone who is probably intimidated (or
impressed) by your presence. Take it as a compliment, and imagine them walking
into a closed door to pass the time while they speak.
Because, the thing is…when your mental game is focussed on
your own performance, on that particular course, in those particular
conditions, with competitors used only as moving yard-sticks to latch onto and
pass….any mind-trickery is a wasted exercise. Your lead-up training cannot be
re-done, so accept the condition you are currently in as being the cards dealt,
and play on!
Plus, if you don’t resort to big noting yourself, or
intimidating the other runners, you will inevitably be playing the trump-card
of being ultimately aloof and mysterious; which is really cool!
CONCLUSION – NONE OF
THIS MATTERS!
It’s true….none of this matters. It just doesn’t freakin matter!
If you fight your own battles, run your own race, and set your own records you
will gain more fulfilment out of what should be a continually challenging, but
rewarding sport. It’s cool to know that you can run, or walk, or shuffle, or
crawl further than most people. When did that satisfaction not be enough?
And, realistically only one of us will ever be the best, and
even if we do get that chance, it’s likely that someone better or faster will
come along soon enough. Records are broken all of the time, which sounds
defeatist, but it’s more dangerous to hang all of our emotional stability onto such
an intangible concept (of ‘the best’)!
You may never run a pb again (you might run plenty)…which
sounds quite depressing…but the fact remains that if you have run it…it’s
recorded, you’ve achieved it! In black and white that time/distance can NEVER
be taken from you. Congratulations!
In short….it just doesn’t matter if someone ran faster than
you today, or previously…
So long as you find the purest reasons to run…
…the rest will sort itself out (probably).
Till next time!
Clay Dawson
Chief Complainer at the Pessimist factory...
and intraining Sponsored Athlete
(Check them out here. They're AWESOME)
